So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
