Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize