i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I forgot wine drunk hurts
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
