your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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