I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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