My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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