I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
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So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
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There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
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