I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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