At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
