If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize