let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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