Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
