he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Randomize