how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
