i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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