we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
