i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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