i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize