I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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