Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
