I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
