I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
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