This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
