There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
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bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
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