Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
the day after is always just damage control
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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