It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
