Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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