and you said cock pushups were impossible
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
