I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
