So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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