she was so not down for the gang bang
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize