I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
