Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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