i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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