It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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