I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
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