From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
