My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
