I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize