dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
