Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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