Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
