is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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