I just made out with a guy for $7.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
