i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize