The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Randomize
