Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
my liver is dry heaving
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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