all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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