i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
