Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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