I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
